Me: "Wow! Every time my nails come into my field of vision, they're all I can look at!"
The Prince: "That's because your attention span is, in general, zero."
Me: "No, I don't think it's that. I think it's because I like shiny things so much. I'm like a magpie."
The Prince: "What's a magpie?"
Me: "A bird that is attracted to shiny things. I think they collect sparkly things in their nests."
The Prince: "That sounds made up."
Me: "It's not! I know it's not because there's the magpie bird in The Secret of NIMH! You know, the big black bird in the movie? He likes sparkly things? I think his name is Jeremy."
|Jeremy the magpie: "Ooooh a sparkly!" [via]|
The Prince: "I don't think that a fictional character possessing such a trait makes it true, sweetie."
Me: "Fine! I'll Google it!"
The Prince: "Okay, but don't get angry when I'm riiiiight..."
Me: "You're not right. You're never right. Here's the Wikipedia page. I'll read it to you."
The Prince: "Okaaay."
Me, reading from Wikipedia: "...The Magpie has long been associated with a habit of stealing or otherwise collecting shiny objects... howeverthisbeliefhasnoevidenceinwildlifestudies."
The Prince: "Wait, what was that? What was that last part? I missed it. Say it again!"
Me: "IT SAYS THIS BELIEF HAS NO EVIDENCE IN WILDLIFE STUDIES."
The Prince: "So I'm right! Hahaha! I'm RIGHT!"
Me: "Fuck you, go to sleep."