Wednesday, August 29, 2012

And then I wrote a list of grievances disguised as a love letter

The Prince has been acting romantically lately, because of our little bet.

It's also been brought to my attention that this blog makes it seem like I am mean to The Prince, and that I never say nice things about him.

That's almost true, but not quite.

Anyway, after receiving a particularly sweet love letter the other day, I decided to compose my own love letter to The Prince.

Here it is:

Dear Prince,

I love you.

I love you even though you eat all of the blue creamsicles.

Every time we buy them.

I love you even though you think that the song Closing Time is by Third Eye Blind.

It's not, asshole, it's by Semisonic and you know it.

I love you even though you dump fresh baskets of laundry all over the floor.

For no apparent reason.

I love you even though you drive too fast and make me think I'm going to die.

Every day after work.

I love you even though you drink all my chocolate soy milk.

But please stop doing that.

I love you even though you don't know how to use apostrophes.

It's a challenge, but I manage.

I love you even though you think Meat Loaf (both the musician and food variety) is incredible.

Because he's not, and meat loaf as a food is also disgusting.

I love you even though you use my good shampoo.

Every time you take a freaking shower.

I love you even though you are a ginger kid.

HAHAHA.

I love you even though you didn't buy me that bracelet.

Yet.

I love you even though you are a giant shithead all of the time.

Because you are mine, little ginger kitten, and you make me happy even when you drive me crazy.

With a grin,

40 comments:

  1. Teeheehee this is too cute! That little ginger kitten is alright too, I guess.

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  2. HAAHHAHAH That's beautiful. A real example of true love.

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  3. oh, true love.

    Dammit, i just realized that's what Alicia Marie wrote.

    I don't really know what to say to this, it's hysterical. I am going to just blame the fact that my fingers are STILL numb from sleeping pills.

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  4. I am going to have to defend the Prince here. Meatloaf is awesome as a musician, although I do detest the food kind.

    Tara
    Penniless Socialite

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    Replies
    1. see, you can only like one or the other, not both.

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  5. True love at its finest. He's a keeper that one. Especially if he counts this as romantic. Well done.

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    1. haha. he better count it, 'cause it's all he's getting.

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  6. I hope you don't mind, I totally facebooked this. Cause it's awesome. My anniversary is coming up, I may have to make him something similar, maybe a little less honest though ;)

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    1. oohhh I don't mind at all, in fact I love that you did! :)

      I'd love to read yours when you do it!

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  7. Seriously, real love is sticking around, even when you have to deal with really annoying shit that makes you want to punch them. For example, I love Andrew, even though he says buying hunting guns is a financial investment. Because no its not, you shitard. You're just feeding me bull.

    See? True love.

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    Replies
    1. hahahah. you called him a shitard. You're the best.

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  8. I love this. I think every woman could write something like this to the man that they love.

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    Replies
    1. I think so! They're cute and all.. but sometimes... grrrr.

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  9. hahaha very clever. I see the love in it!

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    Replies
    1. I think a little bit of it shines through ;)

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  10. haha you're so romantic!
    little ginger kitten.. omg hahah

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  11. The hubs and I write our own Valentines cards to each other (to try to be more romanitcal and less commercial cause we're cool like that) and this is totally what type of card he's getting next year! Thanks for the idea!

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  12. Now that's love. Funniest part... ginger kid. HAHAHAHA Gingers. Always amusing.

    Also? Meatloaf IS disgusting. I mean seriously, who thought of that. A loaf. Of meat. UGH!

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    1. ahha yeah, ginger jokes are always amusing.

      and the meat loaf.... VOM.

      I know sharks aren't really that scary ON PAPER, but if you were swimming and one was like BAM, I'M A SHARK.... you'd be scared, I think.

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    2. I'd probably try to pet it. I'm a child (read: asshole) like that.

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  13. LOVVVEEEE THE NEW BANNER. I love sharks. But yes, terrified of them. I want to go swimming with them one day (maybe on my trip to Bali this year).

    And I can't get over the apostrophe thing. Sorry, but you need to educate your ginger kitten, ASAP.

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    Replies
    1. I love 'em too, but yeah, terrifying. I'm glad you like the banner.

      I'm working on his apostrophe use... it's improving.

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  14. i sense that you might not get that bracelet after this haha. hilarious. i feel like the prince should do a guest post sometime.

    love, little.

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    Replies
    1. I keep asking him to do one... he says he will someday... fingers crossed...

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  15. Well I love you, The Management, even though you are mean to Prince. In fact, I love you because you are mean to him (Sorry Prince, but it's funny!). :)

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    Replies
    1. and this is why I keep you around, miss. ;)

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  16. It's so nice to know there are other meatloaf (food version) haters out there. I feel so alone sometimes.

    As for Meatloaf (musician), eh.

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    Replies
    1. exactly! "eh" is the perfect describing word for that music!

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  17. HAHAHHAHA, well isn’t this disgustingly cute. Mostly adorable though.

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Thanks for commenting, lovely human.